Run No. 1347              17^th July 2010

Venue:                           Chez Mumblehead

Beer:                              Red Squirrel & Weston Cider plus Apple Mark E Mark’s Paint Stripper!

Location:                      Little Hadham

Hare(s):                         Kylie & Mumblehead

Runners:                      11

Virgins:                          0

Visitors:                         0

Newies:                         0                                 

Hounds:                        1

Après Hashers:           0

Total:                             12

Membership:                Looking for Clues Sherlock!

For the Saturday ‘Grunter Memorial Run’ there was a low turn out, even though the time had been moved to Noon from the previously advertised 11:00Hrs, something that Windmill was quick to pick up on!  Mr. X said that he should blame the last committee for having to hang around for over an hour before starting the Trail!

The arriving Hashers were ushered to park around behind the goat pen as Paul didn’t want anyone form parking on the freshly seeded grass beside the freshly laid pebble drive way, nor did they want the pebbles from drive to end up in the grass beside it.

The later start proved to be effective, as Porky Pie & ARP arrived at Chez Mumblehead just as the Circle was about to form, so they were given a few minutes to get themselves together before the off.  ARP immediately fell I love with the place, she would be happy just to live in what was the old Forge!

With the (old) GM not present, it was down to the RA to make sure the Pack were introduced to the correct Run number, with a bit of working out from the previous few Runs & an educated guess proved to be correct! 

The Hares were asked to step forward to explain what the Pack could expect to find out on the Trail, a menagerie of animals were mentioned for the Hash to watch out for & then they were directed out to the main road & told to turn right toward Little Hadham!

Mr. X & My Lil’ Sperm ‘ead took up the mantle of FRBing, Sludge was right behind them by the time they had reached the first CHK just beyond the playing field & Village hall!  While My Lil’ Sperm ‘ead & Kobe continued further in to the village, the RA & Sludge crossed the road & searched a footpath up to the Westland Green & having followed the route out beside a house & the back garden, the Dust was picked up in the fields to the west of the village.

It was a long trot up along the edge of the field of golden wheat, the sun was beating down on such a hot day made sure that the pace wasn’t too fast, the slight gradient only added to the slow start!  The next CHK was found on the crossroad with a farm track, Sludge was keen for the RA to carry on with the footpath through the next field of wheat & up along side the Queer Wood (Oh Err!).

Mr. X followed Sludge‘s wishes & he picked up the Trail, at last there was some shade from the sun, the Pack now just had to compete with a few nettles & brambles that had began to encroach on the path. 

The Next CHK was found at the end corner of Queer wood, up on the level beside a horse paddock.  Mr. X clambered a stile & found Dust leading into what seemed to be common land behind the horse’s paddock but this soon petered out by the time he had reached the opposite corner.  Sludge tried looking over at the continuation of the footpath across Chapel lane, he wouldn’t find any Dust there, meanwhile the RA cut down the lane while My Lil’ Sperm ‘ead, Windmill & Porky Pie all retraced their steps!  As for Sludge, well he does what he does best & look all over the place to try pick up the Trail.

The RA managed to stumble across Trail & he followed this down Chapel lane to be come across a set of arrows that would direct him on to a bridleway.  Now the shade of the path was appreciated as the RA made his way down to a T, which was upside down as he approached it!  Remembering that Kylie has set Trails in the past that allow the Hashers to run through the upside down T, Mr. X tentatively went through to find a CHK!

Now his first choice of the two options took him out on to a private drive & all the way out on to a dead end of a private road, he searched out to where it joined Chapel lane just beyond where he had short cut from earlier!  But of course there was no Dust to be found in either of the two directions.  So, it was all the way back to the CHK & down the other option, which led on through by the large rear garden of one property, the path turned to cross over a dry brook & then it led out to Westland Green lane.

On coming out on to the lane, Mr. X discovered Psycho & ARP coming toward him form one direction, which they informed him was a short cut!  Mr. X was now confused as to whether he had been running the Trail backward?  But he decided to persevere with looking down the Lane to a T-junction, where dust was found.

The Trail followed the lane around, passing by a farm house with a lot of yapping little dogs in the garden, the Trail came out at a small green where the next CHK was found.  The choice of heading down to the uncapped road looked the more scenic choice.  Dust was found in that direction & the RA soon found himself running on by a duck pond & out to a gate in the hedge by a tennis court!  On the other side of which he spotted an arrow & the letters S & C to indicate that this was a short cut!

Mr. X went back to make sure that Psycho & ARP knew the correct way to follow on, as he saw it at the time.  They caught up & he pointed out the short cut as he went off to search through a farmyard behind Alder wood to find the possible long Trail!  Once through the farmyard he found no more Dust, it seems that the T there had been removed & it wasn’t the Long Trail!  No that was back up toward Westland Green & around Pig’s green.

The yapping of the dogs meant that he now knew that the rest were on their way up to the CHK by the green.  When he returned to the Short Cut he found that the Hare was now there, he explained that the Long Trail was back from the CHK on the green.  By this time the rest had caught up, except for Bus Stop, & they were all keen on taking the Short Cut, which they did!

At the end of the field with the tennis court, the Pack found themselves on the edge of the Ash Valley Golf course, Windmill showed concern that Bus Stop was not among the ranks & he turned back to go & find her!

The Trail had been hard to fathom out in part so far, but things would get worse as the Pack made their way along the edge of the fairway.  Dust was found leading down toward beside Caley Wood but this soon disappeared by a gap for a desire line running in to the wood beside the course. 

The Hare appeared on the scene & he said that that the confused pack, milling around looking for the Trail, should be on top of a CHK at this point!  It soon became clear that the CHK had been obliterated by some fool, finding the Trail would now get harder to locate in places!

The Hare ushered the Pack down the hillside, on the edge of the fairway, along the way Skip made a comment on the flag poles, which related to bird scarers in a crop field a couple of year back!  Dust was found but once down in the down to a crossing point over the hedged in ditch, to start along the side of a crop field before finding a footbridge back over to the Golf Course.

Sludge led the RA, My Lil’ Sperm ‘ead out by the small Club house & up toward Damsel’s spring, but they were soon called back when it was found to be false!  The FRBs were now having to make up ground on Psycho & ARP who were way ahead of the Pack as they made their way out to a fallow field further to the south east!  Here the Trail had been scrubbed out, who ever had done this even went to the trouble of placing grass & twigs over the kicked out CHK.

Fortunately the RA was in Tonto mode & his tracking skills detected the poor camouflage over the CHK!  Sludge took up the mantle of finding the Trail as he cross a wooden bridge & led the way down in to the horse paddock that is home to Dan & his friend.  Psycho quizzed Kylie as to which of the equines were Mumblehead’s.

The Horses seemed top become exited when Porky Pie crossed through the paddock, perhaps they thought his red hair was a carrot to eat?  The Trail now led out to the Hadham road & soon the Pack were looking as if they were heading toward Little Hadham, the local bus went by but it was in the wrong direction for Mr.X to use his Explorer Ticket!

The RA crossed the lane & he began to run as the Trail ran down a footpath by a pumping station, this ran on the inner edge of a crop field, he had the scent of Ale in his nostrils as he made his way down the path parallel to the river Ash beside the Hadham road.  This route led out in to the village to emerge beside the Nags’ head Pub!

Of course the Pack stopped off for a well deserved refreshing pint of well kept ale!  There were several topics of conversation, one was Bus Stop going missing, followed by the c*ck up that InterHash turned in to!  But the over riding one was the fact that Porky Pie’s 25th anniversary polo shirt, he was wearing out on the Trail was absolutely covered in thunderbugs.  He took it off at one point, in order to enjoy his ale ‘bug free!’ But his exposed torso was just too bright for the rest of the Pack & he had to put it back on before someone’s retinas were damaged!

The Pack only enjoyed the one pint as Mumblehead was on the mobile to Kylie to let him know that food was ready, & what a spread she & Paul had put on.  The veritable feast was accompanied by a splendid pint of Red Squirrel’s Conservation, inside the marquee.

Sludge wasn’t going to be out done by Porky Pie’s thunder bugs, oh no!  He managed to get himself stung by a wasp!  If this wasn’t enough entertainment, then watching Porky Pie erect his & ARP’s tent was much more amusing!

The Pack relaxed & enjoyed the music that Paul had put on, whilst just talking the usual nonsense.  Having gorged them selves once, there would be a second round of food!

Pepé le Pew, Pebble Dash, Puddles & Spillage arrived in time for the evening soiree, as did Mark E Mark & Lobby Lobster, then Ewok & Back Pack.  Now there were More Hashers than chairs, which mean the 3 second Rule (yes I know there are no rules on the Hash!) was implemented.  The chairs to get in were the small blue opo-up one, or Pepé le pew & Pebble Dash’s personalised motor racing chairs!

 As the evening drew on the temperature dropped by quite a few degrees that the civilian guests took shelter in the former smithy, while the Hash soon found that they may have a couple of potential pyromaniacs amongst their ranks as Puddles, Spillage & Back Pack took a fancy to the fire the Hash sat around to while away the small hours.

            Those gathered were surprised to see that Lobby Lobster had given Louis a trim, the poor baldy dog now had a Herts Haircut!  Talking of hair, Pepé le Pew seemed to be on a one track subject for most of the evening & night, & that was the colour of Porky Pie’s ginger hair, luckily for Pepé Red Light hasn’t run with us for a couple of years, or she would have put him in his place.

Mark E Mark brought along another gallon of his home made Cider, but it wasn’t quite as smooth as last year’s classic vintage!  This combined with the Westons Cider was enough to put some to sleep, My Lil Sperm ‘ead disappeared earlier than most, with Kobe, as he had to set the following day’s Trail!           

Sludge decided that he was going to leave his car at the Chez Mumblehead, & after a couple of failed attempts to catch the 700 Bus back to St Evenage, he managed to get onboard one & go home to sleep in his own bed. 

At least Skip didn’t have that problem as Psycho was driving him to an anniversary party, he would have to contend with the Fijian Rum that Little Hole’s God Father conjures up!

Those still around the camp fire heard some strange mutterings from My Lil’ Sperm ‘ead’s tent, what was he doing with Tupac Kobe in there?  The less we know the better!

Mark E Mark’s Cider wasn’t the only treat, later on the seemingly now traditional home made Sloe Gin came out, after the second glass of this the RA knew it was time for him to retire for the night!