Run No. 1369               28th November 2010

Venue:                          The Red Lion

Beer:                              3 Real Ales

Location:                      Great Offley

Hare(s):                         Mr. X

Runners:                      12

Virgins:                           0

Visitors:                          0

Newies:                          0                             

Hounds:                         2

Après Hashers:            1

Total:                             15

Membership:                Hardy soles!

                It was a low turnout for this week’s Trail, in fact the lowest for a long, long time to start with.  Perhaps it was the weather that put a lot of the regulars off of attending this morning.  Those who did make the effort on this chilly morn found that the local area had been dusted with a light sprinkling of snow, but as it wasn’t huge drifts so it didn’t explain the low numbers.

            The Hare had decided that he would set the Trail that morning, braving the really cold weather before the Sun was high enough to melt some of the white stuff.  A modest Circle formed in the Car Park, half of whom had been keeping warm in the RA’s car before the opening ceremonies.

            The Joint Monkey stood in for the absent GM, so no Traffic Cone was needed this week.  My Lil’ Sperm ‘ead was a little disappointed when Paxo got the Run number correct at 1369 (Fnar! Fnar!), the GM should take notes on how it’s done. 

Then it was over to the Hare, he informed the Pack that the Trail was set in the usual Flour.  There was some consternation amongst those who probably don’t have 20/20 vision, but the Hare pointed out that the Flour was not of a pure white as the snow, plus he had thrown it on to trees, fences & allsorts of obvious places along the way.

            Kylie & Roger the Cabin Boy arrived just as the Pack were sent off over the icy lane toward Great Offley House farm, Sparky & Sludge led the way & they was soon taking the rest of the Pack around the concrete path following the edge of the field toward the farm yard, only My Lil’ Sperm ‘ead had the sense to follow the arrow which directed the Hash off of the concrete & over the snow covered grass enclosure to a kissing gate in the corner of the hedgerow.  The others were put on the right track by the Hare.

            A CHK was found just before the Kissing gate, on the other side of this were two options, Sludge took the path along the field’s hedgerow running to the westward, while the others went for the other choice along the south-westerly hedge.  Biscuit certainly enjoyed her mooch along the hedgerow & she led Does She Knightly on with the majority of the Pack.

Sludge put some effort in to his calling of “On! On! as he followed the Dust up to a T, then his calls ceased as he cut across the frozen white covered grass of the enclosure.

The Hare looked back to see if Roger the Cabin Boy & Kylie were on the right track, but they couldn’t be seen as they were still setting up a wheeled basket for Charlie to sit in & be dragged along in.  The RA couldn’t believe this when he was told about it!

Sparky seemed a bit hesitant to search around the perimeter of the next field, Paxo pointed out the arrow, nestling in a kicked out patch in the snow & so the Pack moved on around the edge of the field on a strip of grass set aside from the crop of snow covered seedlings.  Along the way it became clear that the almost virgin snow was criss-crossed with a multitude of large avian footprints, the Hare said that when he set the Trail earlier that morning there were loads of pheasants out & about making these tracks.

No Eye Deer reckoned that pheasants are the stupidest of all birds, no doubt about that since the Dodo is now extinct!  The Hare said that further on in the Trail there was set-aside land with tall corn stalks that was buzzing with other birdlife like chaffinches.

Having made it around the green strip of the field to the wide farm track running beside Angel’s wood, the Pack seemed to struggle to see the CHK right in front of the Footpath marker post, which had a distinctive blob of flour upon it.  Sludge & Sparky set off to the south toward Woodfern Wick, while Paxo looked off in 180˚ in the opposite northerly direction, there he spotted Flour on the oak trees lining the edge of the plantation.  My Lil’ Sperm ‘ead disappeared in to the woodland, where there was no path, but he was in there to scare the squirrels.  This didn’t explain why No Eye Deer followed My Lil’ Sperm ‘ead in to the plantation?

Anyhow, “On!” was called from both directions & it was the JM who had successfully taken the correct path to the corner of the field.  No Eye Deer & My Lil’ came out of the wood, not together, while Sludge & Sparky turned around on the white expanse of the snow covered field they had found a Falsie on.  Sludge told the Hare that he didn’t see a T out there, but Mr. X reassured him that there was one as he doesn’t use the lazy ‘Three & On!’ method of Trail laying!

The Trail took to a farm track leading northward, now the Flour had been placed upon the upright fence posts for the wire fence to stop anyone roaming across more crop land.  At the T junction with a farm track running from east to west a CHK was found.

Paxo & Sparky soon found Dust heading down the hillside, Sludge was in pursuit, closely followed by No Eye Deer, Does She Knightly & Biscuit but My Lil’ Sperm ‘ead knew this area from setting a Trail with Mr. X for the Ancient Britons Hash in back in the summer, he believed that this would be a Falsie & this was proved to be a correct analysis.

The Pack were a fair way down the hillside by the time they realised they were off Trail, as Paxo & Sparky had gone through two Ts, so it was along trudge back up the hill to find the Trail had been marked off to the north.  Here the Hare had placed the blobs of flour on stones that had no snow on them.  As the Trail progressed, it passed by the set-aside strips on the fields to the left, this was home to some varied birdlife, but not the Red Kite the Hare had seen while out setting the Trail.

The Trail followed the track along the tree-line, there was a splendid vista out over the white rolling hills toward Lilley Bottom (Fnar! Fnar! Pebble-Dash).  This long stretch led the Hash out by Keeper’s cottage & the first Held CHK on the Trail, once they had negotiated the slippery iced up Luton White Hill lane.

Sparky questioned the Hare about there being no Flour out on the snowy False Trails he had fallen for, the Hare said that there was & My Lil’ Sperm ‘ead backed this up by pointing it out, he added that Sparky was probably suffering from ‘Snow Blindness’!

No one fancied the idea of searching the icy lane where it descended the steep hill, the favoured option was to take the bridleway leading down the ridge to the old Luton road & the Hare was generous enough to point the Pack off this way, once Biscuit & Does She Knightly were up with the Pack.

On the way along the top of the ridge, the Pack could look through the sparsely covered hedgerow to see a dog training school taking place in the opposite field, most of the passing Pack made comments about the GM taking Winston there?  [It’s probably too late for that! – Ed]

Anyhow, the Trail came out to the end of the short, jutting out part of the hedgerow, then it was down the steep slope to the Luton road, at the bottom of the hill the Trail crossed over the old road & a CHK was found.  Sludge & Sparky were quickly on to the obvious path, which had a footpath signpost showing the way up the hedged in farm track beside the end property of the homes lining the one side of the road.

As Sparky & Sludge took to a Falsie, No Eye Deer & Paxo were called back from there too, as the Hare marked it to be a Short Cut.  Once Sparky & Sludge had come back, Does She Knightly took Biscuit up the Short Cut toward the by pass of the A 505.

Now the Main body of the Hash made their way on down to the west to run by the row of homes & then to take to the edge of the verge as the lane ran around the bend to Lilley Bottom.  Sparky was unsure as where to go as the Trail passed by a pull-in for the entrance to a horse paddock, the others carried on as the Trail came down to the junction where Lilley Hoo lane comes off of the old Luton road & heads beneath the by-pass above.

An arrow directed the Hash beneath the bridge & out to a double S bend that snaked around to a CHK beside a large tree trunk laying at the start of the footpath along the edge of the hedgerow separating  of the fields to the north of the by-pass.  Sludge chose the correct option out along the edge of the fields, while Sparky wandered off along the lane to the east.

No Eye Deer & My Lil’ Sperm ‘ead wandered along with the Hare as they followed the Trail over the rock hard frozen ground, this surface wasn’t suitable for running & everyone too heed of the Hare’s warnings about his misfortune to walk on to a rare large bit of flat snow covered area & to hear the distinctive sound of cracking ice as his foot disappear through in to the cold puddle below!

Here the Dust was place on telegraph poles in the field, & on the twisted & gnarled old trunks of the main stems of the hedge, along this bit it became quite obvious why this wind-break hedge was still left to separate the fields!

Sparky soon passed by the walkers, as he ran on by to catch up with Sludge on the longest stretch to the end of a second field.  This one being ploughed ready for the next crop, the Hare decided that there was no need to put a CHK in at the junction with the footpath coming down from the ridge which the village of Lilley Nestles behind, no one would search that way.

Instead the next CHK was found a the crossroads with another of the paths from off of the ridge, here No Eye Deer seemed keen on going off in the wrong direction & she admitted as much as she headed further eastward in to the next field.  Surprisingly Sparky actually chose the correct option, even if it was up the steepest of the choices!

By now the Sun was high in the clear sky & as the Pack climbed up the sheltered hillside it was getting fairly warm on the hike up beside a hedge with plenty of Sloes still hanging on at the end of the season.  Then warming sun also mane that it was easier to see the Trail were the snow had melted away.

At the top of the ridge the path turned a few degrees & came to a Junction with Honeysuckle, here a CHK was found.  It was also the spot where Sparky found his old ways coming back to him as he headed out on the path to road to Little Offley, he was the only one to go that way as the rest made their way up Honeysuckle lane.

Along the way up the wide track, between two very mature hedges, My Lil’ Sperm ‘ead commented on when this was ran on the Ancient Britons Trail, that time it was really overgrown & almost impassable.  This time it was a clear run out to the A505 by-pass, Sludge scuttled across the  main road, he was first to see the dust on the remains of a stile where the Trail joined the dog led footpath the Short was put on earlier.

The Trail now ran on the hedge parallel to the main road, up ahead where Roger the Cabin Boy & Charlie, who was walking a long, which left Kylie pulling an empty wheeled basket behind him.  If he wasn’t using it for the dog, then if he had been on the loop on the other side of the by-pass & he could have picked the last of the sloes & put them in it!

The Hash now reached the penultimate CHK of the Trail, the obvious choice of heading toward the prominent water tower at the end of Great Offley would have no Dust there at all, Sludge was soon down the alternative along the edge of the farm land & back toward the old Luton road.  On a small bit of fallow land at the corner of the crop field & the road a Held CHK was found.

The Pack were now on the very edge of the ancient village of Greta Offley, named after King Offa, who built a Palace there

Once the Pack were almost back together, the Hare directed the Hash over the road & on toward the open green by the old Luton road leading out of Great Offley, here the Trail was placed along the trees lining the way down Salusbury lane, as the Pack started off to go down that way, Does She Knightly & Biscuit came back from up the old Luton road, where they had been to look at the village after a bit of a wait at the Held CHK.

            The Trail was now a simple case of running the length of Salusbury road to where it comes out almost opposite St Mary Magdalene Church, but three quarters of the way along this Sparky & Sludge were tempted to cross the road & leave the side the Trail was on by the lure of a stile to a footpath out over the first field the Pack had been in.  They son realised their mistake & rectified this to carryon on along the wrong side of the road to see the ‘On Inn’.

            The FRBs of Pack were back at the Red Lion at 10 past the hour, so with the late start it was a run of an hour & one minute!  Unfortunately for Does She Knightly & Biscuit, dogs aren’t allowed in the Red Lino & they were turned away at the door, so having been given a trash & paid her dues, Twice Knightly left to do some Crimbo Shopping.

            The rest of the Pack settled in to the Bar to enjoy a pint, & sort out their Christmas menus choices with No Eye Deer, the RA decided to carry the Down-Downs over to the next Hash.  As the Pack discussed this they were joined by Dogger, No Eye Deer then seemed to turn in to Psycho as she put her hand out for his subs, only to discover that he hadn’t gone around the Trail & had walked to the Pub for a quiet drink, having forsaken his bike in the icy conditions.  Dogger was lucky, if it had been Psycho he would have been in a Half Nelson on the floor until he coughed up.