Run No. 1428               27^th December 2011

Venue:                          Chez Slug et 3D

Beer:                              Boddingtons, Thatcher’s Pryder (It’s a Perry/Cider mix)

Location:                      Melbourn

Hare(s):                         Slug & 3D, with Port & Starboard

Runners:                        17

Virgins:                            0

Visitors:                           0

Après                               1

Newies:                           0                        

Hounds:                          0

Total:                             18

Membership:               Laughing at Scooping Poop!

            For the end of the year Christmas ‘left over’ Trail the Pack would venture out to cross the northern border of Herts & Hash in Melbourn, Cambs.  The RA & Hare Raiser were early arrivals, having let the Train take the strain to Meldreth & a mile walk over to Melbourn & Chez Slug et 3D.

            The Pack slowly gathered at the Venue, though Paxo found a few were out on New Road driving aimlessly about as directed so by their satnavs.  The time crept around to the Hour, & the time the JM had stepped into the absent GM’s (once more) vacant shoes it was almost 10 past the hour!

The Hash was lower on numbers than expected for this Trail, but unperturbed, the Circle was called & the JM got the Run number spot on!  The Hares were called forward to explain what the Pack could expect out there.  The talk of a couple of road to cross, where caution was needed, this was heeded by the Pack & the Hares’ response to the question of passing by any Pubs? soon led to 3D admitting that there would be one on the Trail. [Haven’t these people had enough booze over the last three or four days?-Ed]

Anyhow, the Pack were ushered off down New Road in a south-easterly direction, Sloppy Seconds & Mr X led the way up to the first CHK on New Road.  Mr X crossed over the road to search on Clear Crescent, but he took the wrong choice, it was My Lil’ who found the correct one on the anticlockwise direction around the crescent.

Having changed tact & followed on in My Lil’s wake, Mr X was just far enough behind him to take advantage of My Lil’ indicating that he had found a Bar CHK up ahead.  Mr X tuned back to a footpath he had just passed by, Sloppy Seconds wasn’t too sure that the Trail would go down this enclosed path behind the high hedge separating the playground & the nearby the homes.  It did.

The RA led the way as the hedged-in path headed out on to the opposite side of the crescent, from there the Trail led on to a CHK on Medcalfe road & here the RA chose the wrong option of the northerly part of the road, a T stopped him dead in his tracks.  No Eye Deer, My Lil’, Sloppy, Underfelt & Sludge all then benefited from the RA signalling that route was false, so it was back to the easterly option of the road as it led down to the Junction with Orchard Way.

Another CHK & this was soon despatched as Sludge, Sloppy & My Lil’ all made their way up Orchard way to come out on a CHK at the crossroads with Orchard road.  A few recalled that the previous Trail, out this way a long time back now, led on over to run the length of Norgets road & up to the High street, sure enough the Dust did go that way.

At the crossroads with the High street, the Pack had to take care when the Trail was picked up straight over on the blind bend in the High street.  The Dust was found heading northward up the Moor, passing by the local school to run up to a Held CHK on the green outside of the local Bowl’s Club.

The FRBs waited for the rest to catch up, by now Pepé le Pew, Pebbledash & Spillage had caught up from their late arrival which had led to some confusion for one Hasher as he heard calls of “On! On!” coming from different directions at the start of the Trail but one lot of these were false ones emanating from Pepé le Pew shouting out of his car as it drove up to the venue.

Mr X was quite impressed by the old tree beside the Held CHK as it is an ideal tree to learn to climb in, something he would struggle with at the moment!  No doubt health & safety would have something to say about this, so don’t tell them!

Conversation then turned to Christmas, Kylie said that he had a good one as he got to work on his mate’s trains on a scale railway, which he has going around his garden.

The Hares arrived with the Pack in tow & the Keenies were allowed to search again, Underfelt was sure that the Trail would lead down to the end of the Moor, where the dead end of the tarmac road turns on to a farm track on a route used last time we Hashed here, he was wrong.

Meanwhile Sludge had gone off through by the Bowls club grounds [Is he thinking of taking up this genteel sport?-Ed] & on to the Sports club behind it, he was checking out the chance of the option taking the Pack out on the footpath the ‘Inn Trail’ used last time we were here.  He too would be wrong, & Pepé le Pew was very vocal about Sludge being on the wrong side of the playing field to where the Trail Pepé had found was running out to the west.

Having seen & heard the rest of the Pack, with No Eye Deer & Pepé le Pew leading Flanders, Pebbledash, Spillage, Paxo, Backpack, the Hares with Port & Starboard, on the opposite side of the pitches, the wayward FRBs would now have to short cut to intercept the path they were on.

Sludge, Underfelt, Sloppy Seconds, My Lil & Mr X all cut across the football pitches to find the Trail running along the edge of the hedgerow running between two sections of playing fields.  Sloppy Seconds was first to the end of the hedgerow, were it almost runs up to the edge of the serpentine like course of the River Mel, Sloppy Seconds stood there for some time & peered at the Arrow directing the Hash back alongside the river Mel in a direction back toward the heart of Melbourn.

As the Pack traversed another green space, Mr X was questioned by Kylie, Sloppy Seconds & No Eye Deer on what gives a town its status, so here you are……. In England, Wales & Northern Ireland, a town is traditionally any settlement which has received a charter of incorporation, more commonly known as a town charter, approved by the monarch.  In Scotland, the equivalent is known as a burgh.  There are two types of burgh: royal burghs & burghs of barony.

The Local Government Act 1972 allows civil parishes in England & Wales to resolve themselves to be Town Councils, under section (245 subsection 6), which also gives the chairman of such parishes the title 'town mayor'.  Many former urban districts & municipal boroughs have such a status, along with other settlements with no prior town status.

In more modern times it is often considered that a town becomes a city (or a village becomes a town) as soon as it reaches a certain population, although this is an informal definition & no particular numbers are agreed upon.

[Enough facts! Back to the Trail- Ed]

The Trail now led the Hash on to come out by the grounds of All Saints Church, as the Dust emerged out on to Station road, My Lil’ & Mr X slowed up, since they knew that the Trail would lead through the olde worlde part of Melbourn & out to a CHK before Station road reaches the A10.  The Trail would now pass under the A10, through a concrete bridges decorated with murals by the local school kids.

Sludge & Underfelt were temporally thrown off the scent as they searched the footpath off to the southwest along to the A10’s edge, No Eye Deer arrived there just as they were coming back & heading out over the edge of a crop field toward Meldreth Station, she marked the CHK in that direction once Pepé le Pew had called “On!” from this option he was on.

There was something of a rural ‘country smell’ at the start of this path, it was wafting over from the shuttered off enclosure of Valley farm on the left.  The Trail led away from the pong & on over to the Railway line, to get to the other side of the Tracks the Pack had to clamber up the concrete steps of the footbridge over the line.

A steep descent on the opposite set of steps led on to a sheltered footpath running down behind the Station to the High Street in Meldreth, a CHK was found where the alleyway emerges out on to the main road through the village.   Most had already seen which way to go at this point in the Trail, since Pepé le Pew was well ahead & was spotted running up the road bridge over the railway in a London bound direction, he could also be heard hollering “On! On!” before the rest had reached the station footbridge over the line.

No Eye Deer & Sloppy Seconds were confused by the approaching RA calling “On!”& indicating with his elbow which way to go.  They were soon rounded up & taken along to the west, then as the High street turns to the south on to the road bridge that rises up over the railway at Chiswick End.  Mr X wondered if Kylie would take note of the cast iron bridge plate as he passed this way?

Anyhow, once over the line the Trail took to a bury lane footpath running off of the bend in the road before reaching the bridge that carries the A10 above it, the track led along to the edge of the A10,on the right was more water, this time a large pond with lots of majestic bulrushes standing up in its banks.  Right by the crossing on the A10, the next Held CHK was found.  Pebbledash had made good progress & was up with the Keenies.

Above the roar of the passing traffic they managed to discuss what they received in the Christmas Party Secret Santa, Pebbledash was there just in time to hear about how her ‘Space Pen’ present has now been commandeered by Pepé le Pew as it can write on a golf score card in torrential rain.

Slug arrived with Starboard & he allowed the Keenies to cross the A10 & start off down the path through to end of the enclosed paddocks to the continuation of Bury lane, which is now separated by the dual carriage way of the A10.  This uncapped track led southward down between a wooded stretch to the Royston road, which was a fair old trot in one go as it passed by the large Victorian buildings to the right of Stable House [What ever happened to Unstable House?-Ed]

Once out on the main road the Pack were directed out over to a wooded area on the southeast side of the road.  The Dust led on between the broadleaf trees on a path parallel to the road, this eventually drifted over to came back out to the Royston road, where it becomes the High street into Melbourn.

The Dust led a little way up the High street before it took a sudden right to take to Water lane, where it would pass by the Black Horse.  A few were disappointed to see that the curtains were still closed in the Pub windows, as they passed by to follow the Trail on to Orchard road, now it was just a simple task of following it up to where this road is separated by the crossroads with New road, there an arrow directed the Hash to the right & back to the On Inn.

The returning Pack were treated to lots of pre-left over snacks, the hot sausage rolls were spot on, as were the mini spicy rice cakes.  The veggie sausages didn’t look that appetising & when the only Veggie present that morning, Pebbledash, pulled a face when she ate one, it kind of summed it all up.

The Down-Downs took place before the main meal, the Hares were awarded for a great Trail of an hour for the Keenies; Pebbledash was out for not enjoying her veggie sausage!  Sloppy Seconds was out for his grey growth of facial hair which looks like he is in contest with Sludge to be next year’s secret Satan Santa, Sloppy Seconds was soon back in the Circle as he was wearing a pair of brand new slippers in the Circle.  The RA was kind to him, as he placed the Down-Down, still in its glass, into the fluffy slipper, as Sloppy said “Her indoors wouldn’t be happy if I returned with a wet slipper!”

Paxo had Mr X out, for after last week’s circle he managed to crown himself after being hunched over in the Olde World pub as he made his way out of the Bar, only to whack his head on the low door frame.  Just as the Pack were going to retreat inside, 3D asked on what day Friday the 13th Falls!!!! So she wa sout for the last Down-Down!

The Pack returned to the house to start on the mountain of food, there was plenty of rice after Slug decided not to read the packet of rice & measure out a couple of cups when the whole packet would do!  There was enough rice to feed a third world country to accompany the excellent homemade curry.

Before the end of the day the Pack were treated to Port & cheese.  Talk of the secret Santa presents, again, at the Christmas Weekend revealed who had a few of the other items.  The bendable banana led to Pebbledash bringing down the tone of the conversation, but not by much!

Slug, Sludge & Underfelt were kept occupied with one of the Chinese puzzles which came out of the crackers the Kids had to pull, they had what seemed like hours of fun with this spring & a hoop.

It seems that everyone had a good time & in fact it was better than last year.  The RA admitted he wasn’t sure if you could pull off the same format twice, but it seems the extra people there added to the fun.  Everyone was still highly amused, astounded in fact, that 1-2-1 could get that drunk on just five pints (according to the honest chart on the Bar wall) or the state he was in when he first came down for Dinner in a state of half dress.

Another topic of conversation was going to the Frankfurt Christmas Market, Mr X suggested that H⁴ should look in to going out & Hashing with Frankfurt when they hold their annual Christmas Market Hash in December.  Who would be interested in going if it was arranged?  Let us know.

But the highlight of the day, for most, was after the food & when the last where heading off home, this was the dog poo game that the kids were playing, this German designed toy has the players feeding a Dachshund, then they take goes to pump the end of its lead by the number of times indicated by a roll of a die.  Eventually the dog will poop out the food & the winner is first to scoop three poops!  It was hilarious watching Starboard pick up the dog & peer up its backside!  Lets hope it doesn’t encourage him to do the same with the real thing?